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December 2002
Not-Snog Report
~Kingdom of Tahnn ~
 
City of Hasst-

Lost and Found

They say the desert is a good place to get lost.  Seemingly endless dunes roll like waves across a sea of sand and heat.  Water is scarce and lucky is he who finds his way through this barren wasteland.

But the Sarin desert is also a place to be found, or to find oneself as the case may be.  While the port city of Hasst on the Telgard Sea may be slow and uneventful, two such Misharr have begun to find themselves among the sweltering wastelands.

Solarra Ignissa, a nomad with a proclivity towards fine wine and wistful reverie, found herself approaching the desert city with her pet raven, Charissa, hitching a ride upon her shoulder.  Quickly immuring herself with an innkeeper, a stocking Misharr male named Wmmeraw, with her untrained but charismatic voice, she found herself a place entertaining at an otherwise lifeless bar, the details of their contract as yet to be undecided.

Kinoc, a male with little social skill, has also embarked upon the path of profession in this sun-baked city.  After a brief quarrel between his forehead and the paved road, he sought the Library of Enlightenment in search of a voice… or many voices as the case turned out.  Being greeted by a motherly Minotaur female, he painstakingly made his wishes known: to become a translator of every language.  Soon, though, he acquired an insatiable wanderlust and questioned the matronly librarian where he should go, eventually deciding, himself, upon Garr.  This decision was only ameliorated by his discovery of a hidden treasure map secreted in a book on the land, which made mention of wealth in the wilderness surrounding Dilgarr.  Hiding the map from the eyes of the Minotaur he ever-so-tactlessly fumbles his way off the subject, planning to keep the map all for himself, the spirit of the adventurer guiding his hand.

All in all, the quiet city houses the Muses, but little other excitement.

Oasis of Ta’ess-

~Ssslythering Ssslythersss here sssending the Ta'ess report to you on the wind.~

~The Sssun hasss blesssed Ta'ess. Lifesss blood sssurfacesss here from deep within the desssertsss sssoul. Drawing travelersss of all kindsss to quench their thirssst at the "Pearl of the Desssert" which it isss well known asss. Making thisss  sssity a plassse to find anything you might want asss long asss you know where to look. Although make no missstake before entering thessse wallsss, the ss'tiss are in charge here!

But the treacherousss and ever changing sssandsss are unleassshing a sssandy windssstorm in the direction of Ta'ess. Will the sssandsss reveal sssecretsss of the Sssun or will they bury a few corpsssesss forever?~

~A female misssharr from a foressst village on the outssskirtsss of the desssert and who performed a magnifisssent danssse at the Chrezznith Issh'chil-Inn hasss been drugged and catnapped by a sssweet talking male misssharr. Did thossse deep dark green eyesss lead her to be bound and gagged? Will ssshe essscape her captivity? Will ssshe want to essscape her captorsss? Doesss her abductor have demonic cohortsss? Which of lifesss pathsss will ssshe choossse?~

~What hasss become of the female misssharr'sss large ss'tiss companion? Hasss the ss'tiss gone to prepare for hisss Trial of Adulthood? Will he come to the lasssesss ressscue? Which way will the Sssun lead the young ss'tiss?~

~A young human male from outssside the wallsss of Ta'ess hasss wandered onto the sssity ssstreetsss in sssearch of a sssertain human healer. With all the apothecariesss available here, why doesss he look for that particular one? Isss it becaussse of hisss reddened hand? Will he find the healer he sssearchesss for? Will he find the answersss he ssseeksss? What troublesss will the lad get himssself into? Will he dessside to ssstay in the "Pearl of the Desssert"?~

~Only the Sssun knowsss the answersss to thessse quessstionsss for sssure. May the Sssun ssshine guidanssse on their choisssesss!~

~Ssslythering Ssslythersss ssslythering off.~

Village of Antoliam-

Bar the Keep and Keep the Bars

The three barkeeps sat around the gambling table, a set of etched bone dice being rolled by each in succession as money passed hands on the outcomes.  This was their typical weekly gathering, and they never played for much, each being too stingy with the monies they had, anyway.  But this was where gossip traded hands, for everyone knew barkeeps heard the most, and they always tried to outdo each other.  Who would have the juiciest tidbit today?  The diminutive Delfaen rogue sat in the corner unbeknownst to the three players.  He was here every week, gathering the latest gossip.  He was the reporter for the Assassins of Antoliam.

“Blimey, if they don’t keep the damn dogs outta this city, I don’t know what I’m gonna do with myself,” complained the grey-haired man from the Ironfist.  “It’s not like I can do anything when Alzayed “Fat” Faheem is the ringleader of this circus.  For some reason he’s stolen some human’s wolf pup, and she’s bound and determined to get herself killed trying to get it back.  That damned “Wight,” his brutish henchman seemed to like the woman well enough, but what good will it do her with Faheem involved?  That pup’s set for the fighting pits for sure.  I should fire that damned Sahana for getting involved, but I just couldn’t stand to see Cael, her little welp, go hungry.”

“You, too,” interjects Ashara, the keep from Cravin’s Inn, “And I thought I was the only one with canine problems.  Wouldn’t you know if some new fella, Cheyanne I believe her name was, comes in with her “pet” wolf, Black.  What kind of pet is a wolf, anyway, I’d like to know?”  Getting a hungry glint in her eye, she continues, “But here’s the good part.  Seems she’s teamed herself up with an elf named Arien Lláthes’‏àin… you probably know his brother Féyan, the goldsmith… anyway, the elves’ sister has been kidnapped from Silverdawn and is being ransomed for a hefty penny, I can tell you that!”  Laughing she ends her gossip, “They’re out to find a moneylender as we speak.  Like the thieves’ll keep their word.”

The Ironfister responds, “Ay!  Mara works for you, doesn’t she?  I heard tale from her beau, Rajan… he works at the southwest gate, mind you… some strange bloke came in with an ord of all things the other day.  Asked if we had a market in the city… a market, he asks!... and proceeds to play a ditty right there in the bazaar at the merchant Zanarif’s tent.  What’ll wander in next, I ask you?”

The barkeep from Dargotten’s Justice, silent until now, finally breaks his silence to tell his tale.  “Pah!  Rubbish, all of it.  Not a decent bit of gossip to be had between the two of you.  Now, listen to what’s past in my place.  I had to rush off to run an errand, but a good customer of mine, a dwarf named Guraid, told me the tale.  Some elf, Eloden his name was, rushed in like the jaws of Grytl were after him.  Finding no help downstairs, the thing decides to run upstairs and procure a room himself.  Well, now, of course this is no way to act in a tavern… we’d all go out of business… so Guraid follows him up to see he’s burst into one of my fare’s rooms.”  Bending in a whispering conspiratorially, he continues, “Here’s where it gets weird.  The elf suddenly bursts into flame for no reason!  Can you imagine that?!  They manage to get him put out, but by that time he’s burnt to a crisp… scarred for life I’m sure!  And he’s delirious saying some name “Thor” and talking like he’s hearing voices and all.  Well, we start to take him out of there only to find one of Dargotten’s Paladins lying on the floor dead, a poisoned knife in his back.  Not a good day at the Justice, for sure!  The bloke’s apparently fine now; Guraid took him to Madam Greesh, but I tell you this: he’ll never step foot in my bar again!”

Too good a bit to pass up, the Delfae leaves unnoticed to report to his superiors.  They’d never forgive him if her forgot a tale like this.  And you never wanted to go unforgiven where assassins were concerned.

 
Village of Naczach’sh-

A Keck in the Right Direction

Thiss iss Sshth Hthcz reporting on the progresss of the Keck Zasshth.  The line at the Gridiron iss asstounding.  Offer the populasse a mine full of gemss, and all of the ssudden the whole world’ss your friend.  Nonethelesss, the more contesstantss we have, the better for Naczach’sh, sso our recruiterss are ever vigilant finding thosse ssertain ssitizenss to sshy to applies without duresss.

One ssuch operative iss none other than Gorruh, the ssexy Misshar, himsself.   Sseeing a prime contesstant in a ssuave fellow Misshar named Tirikia, he immediately made hiss pressensse known.  Ass the lithe feline regarded the Keck plot, he sswiftly took hiss chance to enamor the unssusspecting woman.  By the end of the night, they were cuddling like two birdss in a nesst.  Not quite the sstud he imagined himsself, sshe rejected hiss offer to sstay with him in a nearby inn, but sstill sshe assked if he would meet her the next morning.  Though the meeting wasss delayed, sshe russhed not to keep him waiting.  The delay came from a sspur of the moment russh to make ssure the cresst of Keck was sstill in itss plasse.  By ssunsset sshe’ll be ssigning up for ssure.

Meanwhile ssomewhere elsse in our fair village iss Hsth Yghth, lizardman exsstraordinaire  alsso laying the charmss on a new arrival, a ssquat Ss’tiss female named Kirsana.  Though confussed in her new ssuroundingss at firsst, Hsth Yghth managed to sset her sstraight.  He’ss played on her doubtss, sstating in no unssertain termss, that he wassn’t ssure sshe wass fit to be a fighter, but sshe quickly rebutted sshe had brainss enough to win.  Sso now he esscortss her through the ssity to sshow her the Gridiron field, making ssure sshe’ss equipped at a fair prisse before the big fight.

That’ss all the newss that’ss fit to hisss from Sshth Hthcz in the Department of Promotionss for the Keck Zasshth.  Ssign up now!

Wilderness Tahnn-

~Ssslythering Ssslythersss here… Ssssssss… I am truly ecssstatic to be back here in my home of the far-reaching sssandsss of the Sssarin. The feel of the ssscorching grainsss againssst my belly! The Sssun rewarding the chameleon-like ssscalesss on my back with torrid heat! Yesss! I'll jussst coil up here next to thessse cacti and sssee what talesss I can ssslyther to the Not Sssnog Report.~

  ~Ah yesss… the young female ss'tiss who abandoned her adoptive human parentsss to sssearch for the waysss of her own kind. A guard at the Temple of the Sssun in Ta'ess advisssed her to take the Trial of Adulthood before ssshe continued her sssearch. Poor lasss… didn't know how long ssseven daysss really wasss in the dreaded Sssalt Flatsss. Isss the giant creature that attacked her and the misssharr kitten really dead or ssstill hungry? Isss thisss brave new warrior mortally wounded? Will the young lasss ssstill ssseek her birth parentsss? Why doesss that young misssharr, whossse life ssshe sssaved, travel alone and carry sssuch odd cryssstalsss?~

~A young male ss'tiss of sssong left hisss clan behind and ventured into the Sssarin for hisss Trial of Adulthood. The Danssse of the Sssunbladesss aided him in hisss sssearch for food. A giant bird ssspoke to the lad and beckoned him to follow. The bird had a danssse of hisss own to teach the young ss'tiss, but wasss that really the bird'sss intentionsss? The ss'tiss guardsss warned him to ssstay clear of the minesss, didn't they? What kind of cave hasss the giant bird led him to? Will he sssurvive the final night and day of hisss Trial?~

~A tall misssharr pirate, hisss adoptive father and their companionsss… all of who have been abandoned assshore by the ssshipsss crew. They lossst their captain the next day on their journey up river towardsss Naczach'sh. The following day their luck continued and lossst their human friend and dinghy in an attack by a ssscaladon. Misssharr tribesssman then captured the unlucky travelersss. But all wasss not lossst. They made new friendsss of the tribe and everything sssmelled like a rossse or did it? The old fatten 'em up before we eat 'em ploy? What were thossse looksss of the misssharr pirate and the young female villager all about? Will the group remain there and live happily ever after?~

~Only the sssandsss of time will enlighten usss to the Sssun'sss intentionsss.~

~Welcome to my home brave travelersss of the Sssarin! Ssssssss… may the Sssun ssshow you the way.~

~Ssslythering Ssslythersss ssslythering off.~

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